WEDDING CEREMONY THEMES
Wedding ceremony themes are like the different colors of a stained glass window. Just as each piece of glass is carefully placed so as to create a particular hue, so the themes you choose for your ceremony add color to what you hold most dear.
When creatively fitted together they reflect something that is uniquely you. Maybe it’s the color of romance that takes your breath away, but to this you may wish to add other shades, such as family, children, faith or nature… The following are examples of the most common wedding themes. You may wish to add themes which are uniquely your own.
Romantic
For those wishing a romantic ceremony we can place full emphasis on the two of you. The ceremony can be personalized to reflect every aspect of your being. Like the movements in a musical score, so your love is a history of movements… the first meeting, the first date, the growing together, the challenges, successes, the melding of ideals and beliefs, hopes and dreams. All this can be celebrated. Materials can be selected and words spoken to underscore these magical moments. You may wish to compose your own wedding vows or share heartfelt words to articulate memorable moments and the feelings they engender. Small, intimate ceremonies provide a good setting for this.
Family
In larger ceremonies that include family and friends you’ll likely want to open the focus to include them. Family, of course, is the wellspring of love, the birthplace and cradle of our capacity for relationship. Loyalty, understanding, generosity, sacrifice and other values, like seeds, all took root in your hearts through the planting and cultivation by those seated before you… parents, grandparents, uncles, aunts, significant others. Homage can be shown to them. Their efforts can be lauded. Words of gratitude can be directed to them as they look on with pride. Children, perhaps your own, can be given a place of recognition, as flower girl, ring bearer, or they may stand beside you throughout the ceremony. Your dad may walk you down the aisle, and your moms may wish to light the tapers to begin the ceremony. Guests may be invited to participate by doing a reading, sharing a story, presenting the rings, expressing heartfelt wishes at the conclusion of the ceremony… all celebrating the fact that not only two hearts but two families are becoming one.
Blended-Family
Of course every wedding is a blending families, but in no case is this more evident than when one or both of you have children from previous relationships. Children, especially when they are young, are like little magnets. They capture your heart with their innocence and enthusiasm. They thrive in the comfort and joy that your relationship affords them. When mom or dad is happy they’re happy. Should such be your situation you may wish a blended-family ceremony that includes them. For example, you might like to invite them to participate with you in a sand pouring to represent your blending together as a new family. Children love hands-on. Each child can choose his/her favorite color sand. Along with this you might like to give each of them a small gift during the ring exchange and tell them just how special they are. Depending on their age and temperament, they may like to write and share a few words in the ceremony, for example, why they’re happy that mom or dad is getting married. Also there are readings for children as well as simple “I do” vows to the two of you who are marrying.
With older or grown children the theme of coming together as adopted siblings and family can be celebrated in similar ways. They too can be invited to participate by doing a reading or sharing a few heartfelt words. As newlyweds you may wish to express a promise to them to underscore your continued love and support of them as parents/steparents.
Religious Traditional
If your Christian faith is the inspiration and guiding principle in your relationship, you may prefer a ceremony more traditional in nature. Religious symbols and language embodying your particular faith and highlighting the way God has touched and transformed your lives can be used. You may wish religious language be used throughout, or in parts of the ceremony, for example, in an opening and concluding prayer, a text from scripture, a religious reading, a homily that honors God as being foundational in your love.
Symbolic rituals such as a communion service or a “God’s knot” symbolizing the unbreakable union between God, husband and wife can be incorporated. You may prefer a Christ centered focus that highlights your personal relationship with Jesus.
In the case where one of you is religious and the other is not, or where one or both your families are religious while neither of you are, a blending of traditional and contemporary elements honoring both perspectives can be done. If you and your fiancé each follow different religious traditions a beautiful balance can be achieved by celebrating what your traditions have in common. The heart of all religions is only love.
Spiritual Contemporary
For those of you whose spiritual awareness or center is more personal in nature, you may prefer a ceremony that uses a more familiar language to highlight your spiritual aspirations and experiences. Here your life and the world in which you live are celebrated as the place of spiritual encounter. Ordinary, everyday activities, people and events are recognized as the keys to the doorway of Spirit, the access points into exuberance and Life, the wellsprings that feed the river of love you share with each other.
If a spiritual ceremony is to your taste, you can begin by simply reflecting on those elements that nurture and help ground you in a place of inner peace and happiness. For example, if yours is a spirituality of earth, perhaps it’s spending time in the beauty of nature, hiking forest trails, camping in the wilderness, canoeing on peaceful lakes. The natural beauty of Sedona lends itself perfectly to incorporating outdoor imagery that opens the senses and leads the heart to quiet presence. If it’s a spirituality of home, perhaps it’s the absolute pleasure of sharing together a happy and peaceful home life, enjoying the children, the pets, cooking tasty meals, remodeling the house. If it’s one of action and adventure then maybe it’s working out, jogging, bicycling, traveling, or even your actual work. If it’s more contemplative, then maybe it’s meditating, reading, doing yoga, attending spiritual gatherings. Included also are significant events that have given shape and depth to your lives. Such are spiritual threads that make up the fabric of life and in a spiritual ceremony we would weave them into a pattern to accentuate and celebrate you.
Cultural Symbolic
Every culture uses a rich variety of religious and secular symbols to express the meaning and sacredness of marriage. If you have strong cultural ties, or if you feel drawn to certain symbols used within a particular culture, you may like to incorporate certain cultural-symbolic elements into your ceremony. In thinking about this you may ask yourselves if there are any worthy symbols or rituals within your own or each other’s tradition you can use to demonstrate your love and commitment to each other and express your appreciation for your heritage.
Wedding and ring vows, certainly, are the primary symbols used at weddings to highlight the union of marriage. But besides their personal meaning, they can also convey a cultural-religious meaning that has significance for you. Depending on your background or orientation, you may use vows that are Catholic, Jewish, Methodist, Nondenominational, Hispanic, Celtic, Wiccan, Buddhist, etc… Or you may choose more Contemporary secular vows or create your own.
Symbolic elements and rituals that highlight the beauty and richness of marriage abound… candles, incense, flowers, a rose petal circle, garlands, a canopy, lasso and coins, indigenous foods, the breaking of a glass, a hand-fasting, the warming of rings, a sand, rose or wine-box ceremony, a triple crowning, a tea ceremony, traditional and period-piece costumes, etc… are just a few ideas you may wish to explore in creating a rich and exciting context for your wedding.